I have been super tired. Don’t know exactly why but over this month of May I just feel super exhausted and I don’t feel like doing a lot of things. Which is kind of weird because the month of May is my birth month and my birthday was on May 23rd. So how come I don’t feel as enthusiastic?


One explanation I thought was because of the weather. I remember little ┬áto no good weather in this month of May. The weather sucked. It rained the whole month, if not, it was cloudy. I like the rain, which is why I don’t get why I’m so upset of the weather, was it because of the cloudy days? That is what’s weird about this month. When it’s raining outside and cloudy I feel a bit comfort in me. I was more comfortable staying home and just relax a bit. But also I was not comfortable at all. Over a while, say this weekend for example, I get these waves of boredom and the urge to work. I couldn’t resist it, I didn’t want to. I wanted to work, I wanted to type up my essay, I wanted to work on my script for the my movie, I wanted to do all these things but my body is just dead. I mean I’ve never been this tired before. This morning I woke up around 9, I always wanted to wake up around at least 8 or 7:40 but it never happened, I got up, listened to music for a while, did nothing, ate breakfast, and somehow I managed to get back to sleeping, and I slept till 12. I’ve never done that before, I’ve never been this tired. After I woke up I started doing my homework right away.. yeah right. I did turn on my computer to check my emails and all, pulled up google classroom, pulled out homework sheets, but I just couldn’t start. My mind was too distracted by something. Could it have been my script? Maybe, I did that all day. Thinking about the shots in my head, the characters, the lines.


Then I heard the news. It wasn’t anything new.. another attack. This one was in Portland I think. It was this one guy started shouting racist comments against two Muslim girls waiting at the train station. Then couple other guys stepped in defending the girls, but all of a sudden the man pulled out a knife and stabbed and cut all three of the people defending the girls. Two died.. one barely survived. One of the men who died was a veteran from the army, who fought for this country… The other one was super young, I heard he was just about to begin his life. Is this the world we’re living in right now? I can’t get my head around this, what kind of messed up, fucked up person would ever do something like that. He killed a man that gave his life for this country, he killed a man that protected him. I can’t get my head around that. The worst part is, if the guys just let the man insult the girls and did nothing, maybe just talk to them afterwards, ┬ámaybe that would’ve been better. That would have been a better outcome instead of two of them dead. That is NOT the world I see my children in the future living in, nope, I’m going to try my best to change that. In the meantime, all I can do now is give my heart to those that helped others.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *